And that was Monday afternoon. Back on the EPU unit, a doctor organised for me to be admitted into the ward, to take the medical management under supervision as the sac was now to big for me to safely miscarry on my own at home. I was another one who did get bad news at the 20 week scan. She brought up a picture of the heart on the screen. factor is very strong. I could hardly breathe. I couldn't bear to see the baby and asked the midwife to take him away immediately. Has anyone been told the sex incorrectly at their 20 week scan? Scans cannot find all conditions. It was just a few little things like the kidneys were hard to find, and the stomach was hard to find, but that might be because it wasn't filled with fluid. Many people were deeply affected by their experiences of the 20-week and subsequent specialist scans. And, sometimes, I wish I had invited my whole family into the hospital room to see him. And they, sort of two of them were looking at the scan machine and then they sort of switched everything off and said, 'Oh, I think we have, might have a problem'. And I know I can't hurry up the process of grieving. Or, at the very least, heart problems. We saw the consultant, who was reassuring, saying that he would rescan me and was sure everything would be fine. 20-week ultrasound (anomaly scan) - BabyCenter Australia Registered office: Nicholas House, 3 Laurence Pountney Hill, London, EC4R 0BB. And as soon as she said those words, both of us were like, 'Well what's wrong?'. And that was scanning up from the above the head, then you were coming up through the child's head, so you were seeing the chambers in the brain, sort of it was evident in all four chambers of the brain, then suddenly one chamber was empty. I feel empty and incomplete. I wanted to be a passive patient while the doctor did what he had to do. And it all seemed so near at hand, you know, 31, 30 weeks, you feel like you're nearly, you're on the home stretch. The first words I said were: "If there's anything wrong then it's my fault", I had been working 70, nearly 80 hours the previous weeks and pushed myself hard. We had the 20 week scan yesterday and got some devastating news. So I took the test and jumped in the shower. Went back a week later for the scan and, you were with me for this one, weren't you? I think I was about 20 weeks cos they, the hospital I think did the 12 and the 20, that was their standard thing and, yeah, so I got the 20 weeks one. The gel makes sure there is good contact between the probe and your skin. But they didn't. You may like someone to come with you to the scan appointment. Thinking back, I don't know how we left without him. Do you have any thoughts about that? You can change your cookie settings at any time. We don't know, but it's not looking good'. The sonographer told me to take the notes, and the scan photos with me so they could review them also. He bluntly told me, he wasn't interested in whatever was seen before, he was only going to go by what he saw that day. So it was quite common, this is what happens. I was sent home with a leaflet, strong painkillers and two types of antibiotics. Abortion has never raised any moral dilemmas for me and I am an atheist, so there are no religious issues. Next most likely (but actually in the minority) they identify something which whilst not 100% healthy is treatable. Some people had underestimated how serious any abnormality found at this stage could be for the baby. The 18 -20 week fetal anomaly scan is a watershed in most pregnancies because for the majority of women it will be the last time they are scanned before giving birth. Most scans are carried out by specially trained staff called sonographers. An hour passed and I started to panic. 13/12/2020 20:45. Sometimes doctors will wait to give the baby more time to develop and carry out repeat scans - this had confused several parents we talked to who had gone for repeat scans not knowing that the baby might have a problem. Yeah - in, stomach, out. We just couldn't use the words. Sometimes specialist scans such as 3D scans, or MRI scans, are used to examine the baby in greater detail. I did think it was a bit strange that she wasn't talking, and then she sort of said, 'Oh, I think there's a problem. We were denying him his life. Except for the persistent, nagging doubts. We'd just spent some time away on a, on a summer holiday and come back expecting to have this scan and be told, 'All fine. But on, in the middle of March, 10th March it was, we had a 20 week scan. Parents get a chance to emotionally adapt to news and plan. The sonographer then passes a hand-held probe over your skin to examine the babys body. The ultimate betrayal. The same unique expression he had when he saw our two year old born. And that, that was when things where it started going a bit wrong. By 7pm, I still hadn't delivered the baby. To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account. I give pregnant women dirty looks. Finally, Monday came and we went back to the hospital. It was probably all right but hadn't had any fluid in it at the moment. It felt like a lifetime to reach our 12-week-scan. So we decided to book an early 10 week private scan. I went away and came back, and she couldn't get a good picture. Another sick joke. We had the baby cremated. I remember thinking, 'Gosh' I now know it was a girl, I didn't know that then, that, 'She looks just like her brother'. Sometimes it is difficult to get good views of a baby. I've been incredibly lucky to have such amazing support from Sam, my mum, and close friends and family. Desperately trying to hold onto the glimmer of hope we'd been given. And in this instance the scan was very evident that there was something very seriously wrong. After that I got, I, it was about in, in 19-, hang on a minute, 2001 I got pregnant again, slightly unexpectedly. He was sure the consultant on Monday would see that the measurements were completely normal and that there was nothing to worry about. Where we were living then at the time you only had a scan at 20 weeks. Limitations of the 18-20 week scan On the third day, we got a phone call. I think it's the same - in fact I think it was probably the same room, same consultant - and [sighs] I suppose it felt upsetting because at the dating scan you're full of hope and this scan we knew wasn't going to be good, we knew it was maybe the last time we would see the baby moving around. So we hid in our house. Public Health England (PHE) created this information on behalf of the NHS. But it's bloody hard being miserable the whole time. I didn't want to be convincing him to agree with me. My partner tried to remain calm, and at my request rang my mum. Again, no notes can have been written down because the midwife asked the same question. In most cases the scan will show that your baby appears to be developing as expected but sometimes a condition is found or suspected. I've realised that being a nice person is a luxury some can't afford. There's nothing wrong, you know, we've had all the tests, everything's fine,' and being very upbeat about it all. But that was too easy. This publication is available at https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/screening-tests-for-you-and-your-baby/11-physical-conditions-20-week-scan. It is also sometimes referred to as the mid-pregnancy scan. So I trusted him. Despite this new discovery, the sonographer was still concerned. So we went back the day after Boxing Day, the 27th, and the consultant greeted us, which made my alarm bells go, and she started scanning us and I think her lines were, 'What concerns me about this baby is that they've got a diaphragmatic hernia, which has meant that part of the stomach of the baby was in its chest cavity.'. And also what the prognosis would mean for our two year old: now a very happy child, he would have a completely different childhood with such an ill sibling. We would terminate the pregnancy. In this information, the word we refers to the NHS service that provides screening. These opinions do not represent the opinions of Tommys and are not advice from Tommy's. And I remember, the first thing I remember when something might be wrong, was I saw, I finally, we finally saw an image of the skull on the screen, and there appeared to be a sort of black hole shape in the middle. Later, I did see and hold our baby. There was cause for concern. I felt sad, but not the complete devastation of the last scan as they had seen a change of some sort. Try to relax and take it easy. Those two weeks were agonising for us both. Most scans show that babies seem to be developing as expected, and none of the 11 conditions are found. My wife turned the screen away from her. The 18-20 week antenatal scan and further tests, Ending the pregnancy for family & personal reasons, Deciding whether to see, hold and name the baby, Photographs and other mementoes of the baby, Saying goodbye to the baby - services & funerals, Coping with bereavement - women's experiences, Coping with bereavement - men's experiences, Men's ideas about their role in ending a pregnancy. I was then told yet again bad news. It is as though our pain means we've earned the right to be taken more seriously. I was told that while bad news at the 12 w scan is often of the life or death kind, bad news at the 20 week scan is often of the 'needs an operation in childhood' or 'needs to wear a brace for a year' kind. Did you, how did that scan make you feel? Usually, sonographers will ask a senior sonographer colleague to confirm findings and this should be done immediately. The first midwife seemed to understand what we were trying to say, and said she would ask the doctor to come and talk to us. It is extremely rare for these pregnancies to reach term as they typically spontaneously miscarry early in pregnancy. It can be such a shock so do whatever you need to feel better. Just doing it. I thought I was going to burst into tears. I think I don't everything just seems a real blur because it was, it was such a strange experience. You've had, you've had your Down's Syndrome check and that's okay. They would then re-test me in two days time. We spent the next few weeks in a happy bubble. So and you could see the exomphalus, this little pouch, which was obviously just the intestines where they are. And still we asked to see a, Impact of the 20-week and later specialist scans. 1. For women who have been given distressing news about their baby during the scan, there should be a health professional available to provide immediate support. unfortunately the 20 week anomaly scan can pick up serious issues, hearing heart beats at midwife appointment doesn't let us know what's going on inside the body in detail. He wanted to talk about it, but I didn't. I think the whole experience has made me a pretty nasty person. I hadn't thought about the mechanics of such a late termination, but had assumed it would mean some kind of operation. Tears started to roll down my face. . And I, my husband and I both ran our own business at the time so we were desperate to get back and do some work, and things were going really well, so.. . The hardest thing I have ever done | Health | The Guardian 15/02/2014 08:02. And I am slowly coming to terms with what has happened. I'd had the scan in the scanning room, I can't remember what they call it now, it's silly, it's gone from my head. Emma was 20 weeks' pregnant when a routine scan revealed that the baby she was expecting had Down's syndrome and heart problems. She asked me how far gone I thought we were, and if I could have been mistaken. But you know I knew we had, we had to make a decision that was right for the baby as well. My partner really wanted me to, and by that time I had no sense of what was right or what I should do. Enough for two weeks after he had been cremated. And I couldn't escape the feeling that I was being selfish. I had an appointment with my consultant 2 days later, and again he said, you know, 'Very common - shouldn't worry about it too much, you know, if, the problem is if they find anything else wrong'. We're still not at the end of our journey, but we're much further along. We bought a two tests that evening (quite lucky as I messed the first one up!). The midwife was on the verge of tears and I felt responsible. The thing about that which I felt was difficult is that we could tell when being scanned that there was something very seriously wrong. It is impossible to escape them and each one underlines your loss. So I lay on the bed and my partner sat next to me. The following is a quote from their report: If the scan reveals either a suspected or confirmed abnormality, the woman should be informed by the sonographer at the time of the scan. I'm trying to understand because I haven't seen a 3-D scan, what it tells the parents? But other than that everything was fine. Some hospitals do offer earlier anomaly scans of the baby, but they will not show as much detail as scans performed between 18 and 20weeks. Bad news at 20 week scan | Mumsnet It felt so wrong. It feels very lonely and isolating. As though I went power mad for a week, killing my innocent unborn child, and now I am tainted for ever. Originally I hadn't wanted to go down that road. And for that whole time, my partner and I were both crying uncontrollably. I pray it's just her heart but I can't see anything else is wrong as I have been scanned by a consultant since I was 14 weeks and every time he has said everything looks okay and she is growing consistently. Please note that the opinions expressed by users in Tommys Book of #misCOURAGE are solely those of the user, who is unlikely to have had medical training. The appointment usually takes around 30 minutes. This does not mean there is anything to worry about. But the consultant had found more spots on the heart and the measurements were the same. But with time although we will never forget, I know we will be ok again. I used to think the feeling of your baby kicking inside you and the sight of a foot poking against your skin were the most fantastic things in the world. Read full disclaimer. We walked all the way home. And so began the most bizarre day of my life. Within two days I was waiting in my local EPU unit for further tests. By the time I left the hospital, I was in shock. 12/12/2012 22:41. Dont worry we wont send you spam or share your email address with anyone. And then, so I went to my next scan, which was the 20-week abnormality scan, and we took our first child with us, I think he was 17 months old at the time. I had no idea if we were doing the "right" thing. It was horrible. And I wish that I'd been told at that point, that somebody had actually turned round to me and said, 'Look, I'm sorry, but I think there's something very wrong. She didn't say at the time that it was a major problem or that it was something to watch out for. I know it sounds odd that you want to hear that it's wrong, but you, you know it's wrong, and you, you want to be reassured either that it's okay or is there something seriously wrong. We, I was with my mum, and they scanned and found choroid plexus cysts on the brain, which is just a mark, it's a marker on the brain, it's a, what they call a 'soft marker'. So had to come back in a week's time for a scan, which again is quite a common thing I found out. But at the 20 week scan, which was on a Wednesday, we saw the nurse at the local hospital, the sonographer, and she did a scan and she found that the femur length was quite short in the, in the fetus. My partner watched the baby come out, and for a split second I saw a look of joy on his face. The scan will find about half (50%) of those babies who have heart defects. Some parents wondered if it was possible to have the same scan done at 16 weeks rather than 20 weeks. Again, we weren't understood. DS had 2 soft markers: talipes (club foot) and 'echogenic locii' somewhere - heart I think. Why me and not you, you bastard? And as, and as soon as I saw the pictures of the scan, having had two normal pregnancies, even I could see that there was a marked contrast between this pregnancy and the pictures that I'd had previously. chances of bad news at 20 week scan mumsnet. As I was called for my scan I was nervous and emotional. I want to enjoy my son again, without any reservations. The milk came and stayed for what seemed like for ever. See you in -. How was that scan different from the dating scan? But she told us, she told us, she gave us some more detail, she said, 'There's this, there's a big gap in the brain where there shouldn't be'. You will be able to discuss this with your midwife or consultant. I didn't have a clue. I was sat on the sofa working, my son was at nursery and my partner was in the bath. Perhaps because we are alone in this, it has brought my partner and me very close. It seemed a very arbitrary system, and so you quite often sat outside in the waiting room for a couple of hours before you actually got to see the consultant, which was, seemed you know, I kind of remember thinking before we went in to see him on the particular day when we found out there was a problem, 'Why are we sitting here? Others, including those who had been given leaflets to read about the scan beforehand as well as some who were health professionals, said that they had been nave about the 20-week scan. In some cases concerns in utero fix themselves sometimes needs treatment. Several women had taken young children with them to the 20-week scan because they expected to see 'nice pictures of the baby'. Some of the conditions that can be seen on the scan will mean the baby may need treatment or surgery after it is born, for example cleft lip. He felt doing more blood tests would only cause me more discomfort and false hope. These were said to be soft markers fo a range of trisomies, 2 of which were incompatible with life. And I went for, I went for a normal 12-week scan, at my local hospital and everything, they said everything was fine, there was no problem. Thanks girls, it's amazing how protected our babies are in there isn't it?! Not a good sign in a hospital consulting room. So once again we were right back down, really no, really not knowing what to expect. Everywhere you look, there are happy, fat, smug pregnant women. And the next day we went back to the hospital and we had another scan with a specialist, and he confirmed it was a condition called holoprosencephaly, which I'd never heard of any of these words before, they were just such long words. Wishing to be anywhere, but here being told the same agonising truth over and over again. Bad news at 20 week scan, please help. | Mumsnet Please ask your hospital about this before your appointment. I was becoming numb to the whole process. And attribute some blame to them. For example, the babys brain, kidneys, internal organs or bones may not have developed properly. I would be put to sleep, and when I woke up I wouldn't be pregnant any more. We had to discuss what we wanted to do with the little body after delivery. Again the legs were quite twisted, they said that the baby's sternum was very short - things weren't in proportion you know - the head was quite large, the neck was very thick, there wasn't really like a neck as such it was just things were kind of - there were lots of things that obviously the consultant could see that we weren't aware of. Yeah, yeah. I think there might be a problem'. We'd sort of put those discussions to the back of our mind, and then all of a sudden there are other abnormalities so yeah it was a bit a bit of a shocker [laughs]. I had hope that the little bumps inside me were fighting just as much as I was to stay with me. All pregnant women should be given the booklet by their midwife or GP Screening tests for you and your baby by Public Health England, which gives detailed information about the types of scan offered and what they are looking for. It took 20 minutes to push him out. I get terribly irritated by my close friends and family. But worse was to come. It is a noise that will stay with me for ever. That he was small. With my oldest it turns out she has a minor thing that affects 1 in 1000 of the population and wont harm her at all it's just "there" and with my second the issue turned out to be nothing. . Several women had taken young children with them to the 20-week scan because they expected to see 'nice pictures of the baby'. I felt more informed, and I felt that that was what I needed in my head to see you know, that I've got to accept now that this, all these things are real on the screen and this was really my baby that's suffering all these things [sighs], but I was sad as well. And the local hospital wanted to send us off to the regional hospital to actually confirm that, and were not really prepared to say at that time that there was something very seriously wrong. Check benefits and financial support you can get, Find out about the Energy Bills Support Scheme, NHS fetal anomaly screening programme (FASP), Screening tests for you and your baby (STFYAYB), nationalarchives.gov.uk/doc/open-government-licence/version/3, more information and details of support groups. We had amnio and then spent a week in absoute anguish waiting for the outcome which was no trisomies. So we went home really and I sort of had to think about it all night. Mumsnet carries some affiliate marketing links, so if you buy something through our posts, we may get a small share of the sale (more details here). I was experiencing some light bleeding for the past few days. As I lay down, and the sonographer started, I could see there was something wrong. Emma was 20 weeks' pregnant when a routine scan revealed that the baby she was expecting had Down's syndrome and heart problems. We decided that we wanted medication to help me. Sam squeezed my hand and told me it was ok. Mumsnet carries some affiliate marketing links, so if you buy something through our posts, we may get a small share of the sale (more details here), tbh, they never give you good news at scans. It was, 'Oh we'll come back to that'. Fine, go on my own. It is also sometimes referred to as the mid-pregnancy scan . So instead, I was advised to go home and let nature take its course. The blood test confirmed it was twins. No one else but my partner saw how similar he was to our son. Then, three days later, I would go to the labour ward - the ward I had been expecting to visit in two and a half months. Slightly marked from our peers. How common is it for 2nd baby to come early..? It's been a heartbreaking nightmare. Last reviewed July 2017. There, I would give birth. And then all of a sudden, I was still laughing and we were all very upbeat, and then suddenly, he suddenly said, but I was still, still laughing, and he said to me, 'Oh, there might be a problem, there might be a problem with the, I think this baby has hydrocephalus'. Our week-by-week PREGNANCY emails are a must for parents-to-be. And so this one can't tell you anything, it's pictures, you're going, you're going to see your baby, you're going to get pictures. All the hopes, dreams, and plans we made with our little bumps has been taken away from us. All women are offered a dating scan, and an 18- 20 week fetal anomaly ultrasound scan, in line with NICE and UK National Screening Committee recommendations. I am a darker, harder version of myself. After she had taken all the measurements, the sonographer told us that she was concerned with the length of the baby's limbs in relation to the head. Have I misunderstood what's going on?' We had so much power, we could decide that this little thing should die. (See. You might be offered another test to find out for certain if your baby has one of the conditions. So he was about two weeks smaller than what he should have been. I think what everyone is saying is that most likely outcome is that there are no problems at all. You may need to have a full bladder when you come for the appointment. I wanted to let nature take its course. Previous scans in this pregnancy and with my first child had been fun - a chance to see the baby wriggling around and perhaps find out its sex. I felt I needed proof of what was wrong before I take such a huge decision and that I couldn't do it based on what someone had written on, on the paper. I had a horrible feeling of relief. A black and white picture of your baby will then be seen on the ultrasound screen. And, for a few hours, I'm convinced I've made a terrible mistake. There is always a chance that a baby may be born with a health issue that scans could not have identified. The baby was very, very small. He started to scan me with a cold expression, then told me, "it didn't look good" and that "my womb looked raggedy". I couldn't bring myself to push. I was saving my child from pain and suffering. Reading individual, real-life experiences can be a helpful resource, but it is never a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment from a qualified health care provider. 26/09/2019 22:46. Some say this estimate is really below the reality, and the out-of-pocket average costs are higher. 'Soft markers'. As soon as we arrived, we were shown to this little room. All the time, the baby was kicking and I felt like a murderer waiting to strike her victim. During the examination, sonographers need to keep the screen in a position that gives them a good view of your baby. or sort of light chat that we'd, we'd experienced before with previous scans. This was a ray of hope for us. And so, yeah we got to, carried on with the pregnancy, kept seeing the consultant, kept sitting in the waiting room outside, because there was a terribly long waiting time sometimes, depending on what time you had the appointment. 2022. And she sort of got up and walked out of the room and called someone in. My mum arrived early to look after our son, and my partner and I got a cab to the hospital. The sonographer will be able to tell you the results of the scan at the time. The weeks since that day have been very weird. Any delay in receiving more information about the abnormality and its implications will be distressing for women and this should be acknowledged. Specialist scans