So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness. And youre so exhausted from trying to save him, huh?, No, It was very quick and there was nothing anyone couldve done. NindyaDerisa1318. When they get inside they see an Irishman passed out from smoke inhalation. "No silly, they use the dogs to find the fire hydrant!". A: It was pretty in-tents. A: It was already toast when they got there. - Billy Connolly. What sound do you hear when dragons sneeze?A fire alarm. Why do you call a firefighter when theres a cat stuck in a tree? Why did the rookie bring his bowling ball to the fire station? Why did the firefighter wear his gear out to dinner?Just in case the sauce on taco Tuesday was too fiery. "When I tell people that I work in the fire department, they say it is cool. What happens when a firefighter visits a new place or meets new people?They are always greeted with a lot of warmth! 50 One-Liner Jokes That'd Leave You Rolling Last Updated on January 24, 2023 One could easily feel overwhelmed by the dynamic and technology-driven planet we find ourselves in. A: No, because everyone can jump higher than a fire hydrant (fire hydrants cant jump). Well, that is why I guess he lost his job as a firefighter! When theyve caught fire themselves. What do lawn ornaments do over winter break? You can read more about it and change your preferences. Because it would be witchcraft if they were going all the way up the pole. Why are there no picnic baskets at fire stations? We had a burning desire to bring them to you because we knew how your face would light up! As the fire truck flies down the street, she sees her son attached to the top, yelling: Weyoweyoweyo ! Q: Did you hear about the fire at the circus? Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a Dalmatian dog. Anyone want to know how many firemen and firefighters' jokes are there? Q: Why do fire departments have Dalmatians? If you happen to see a firefighter, please let them know how much you appreciate their service. 2. The fire truck driver looked him right in the eye and said, The first thing were going to do is fix the dang brakes on that truck!. CASUAL WORK ATMOSPHERE - We don't pay enough to expect that you'll dress up; well, a couple of the real daring guys wear earrings. Why is My 3 Year Old So Mean & When to Worry About It? "Hey man, put it out!". A fireman came home from work one day and told his wife and said, "You know, we have a wonderful system at the fire station: "BELL 1 rings and we all put on our jackets. What kind of ears will a fire pumper truck have? You can also share the fact that Benjamin Franklin founded the first volunteer fire company in America in 1736 (in Philadelphia, PA). A panic-stricken man explained to his doctor, "You have to help me, I think I'm shrinking." "Now settle down," the doctor calmly told him. What were the two sons of the Spanish firemen named? What do you call a firefighter who got too close to their job? Q: What kind of women do firefighters get? What did the man say when the fireman asked him how to reach his house on fire?He asked them to come to him via the red fire truck! 80 Short Jokes and One Liners! 95 Best Fire Puns That Will Lighten Your Mood - O-hand If you play with fire, you'll end up burnt. Hey, hot stuff! A: Aquaman. "BELL 3 rings and we're on the fire truck ready to go. Those of you who have teens can tell them clean firefighter rescue dad jokes. I failed math so many times at school,. Me: I don't know when to quit. What did Pikachu say when he met the fire chief? lets start with some short and punchy jokes. When a call comes in, things get real real fast. Why would firefighters be great action movie stars?Because they have a lot of expertise in doing their own stunts! When there is a trailer fire, what is the first thing to get off from the fire truck?A lawn chair! The fireman would always get into a bit of trouble because he was a hothead! One liner tags: insults. * Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove . Q. You get down from a duck. Whats the most important part of a firefighters work gear that they can never afford to be without? Scroll down through these brilliants puns which can also be used as firefighter captions and firefighter one-liners. Firefighter Jokes - BabaMail First of all, their uniforms - no matter which country you live in, firefighters always look just a tad bit like old-fashioned astronauts, dont they? Firefighters are known for their positivity. Turns out, good players are hard to find. Retirement Jokes Are A Light Hearted Look At Retirement What do you call a firefighters hat? What is the main difference between a firefighter and a worker? Creative Bakery Pun Ideas That Will Make You Smile, 38 Sarcastic Jokes That Are Just So Funny Youll Laugh At. A: When they are FAST asleep. A. Hosea and Hoseb (Leans in real close) That means I talk down to people. 2. Give a a fire company 3 new tools to try out and after 30 minutes . A fireman is a person who works to extinguish fires and prevent them from spreading. Their skin. In the United States, there are approximately 1,216,600 firefighters serving in 27,228 fire departments. The Ghostbusters. 4652 Funny One Liners - Funniest Short Jokes - OneLineFun.com Knock knock. A: Holy smokes! Funny Firefighter Jokes - BEST FUNNY JOKES She asked Johnny if his dad was really a stripper in a gay bar and Johnny said "Absolutely not. They use the dogs, she said firmly, to find the fire hydrant., A fireman is at the station house working outside on the fire truck when he notices a little boy next door. Plus youll get a fun bonus Halloween Lunch Box Jokes Printable (30+ Days of Jokes). What should you say when a firefighter is smoking a cigarette? Q. The remote control slips from his hand. Connection! What was the movie Firestarter really about? Skunk Jokes - Clean Skunk Jokes - Fun Kids Jokes What do you do when you see a fireman?You put it out, man. To everyones amazement the little fire engine raced through the Chemical plant gates and drove straight into the middle of the inferno. Theyre smoking. 80 Best Onion Puns, Jokes And One-Liners | Kidadl These firefighter jokes are popular year round, but especially around Halloween as children like to dress up as a fireman or firewoman. 82.53 % / 355 votes. Why was the pandemic bad for the firefighters?Because they had to work in their homes! Why was the fireman late for work during the power failure emergency? That's why firefighter humor is a tradition as old as fire . What's the difference between an arsonist and a firefighter? Firefighters do it with their hoses ! I know you guys can help us out. These guys were REAL fanatics about their golf. Firefighter Joke 16 One day a boy was drowning in a near by lake. "You'll just have to learn to be a little patient." If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? You aren't supposed to use water on Greece fires. Is your ass jealous of the amount of shit that just came out of your mouth? What did the father reply when the son asked him what the least favorite letter of a firefighter is? On his first day of work, she wanted to check in on him so she called 911 and reported a fire at her home. 25 of the best jokes and one liners by Scottish comedians 1. Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. The wagon was being pulled by her dog and her cat. ", Firefighter, Broker, Waterboy, Machinist, Driller, Embalmer, Goldsmith, Hydrologist, Lifeguard, Naturopath, "So, Timothy, what does your father do ?" 143 Firefighter Jokes That Are Nothing But The Best Neilas urkus and Just Kairyt - Barkauskien If we had to choose the least funny profession, firefighters would be our top choice. Q: Why are there no picnic baskets at fire stations? 75 Hilarious Golf Puns and One-Liners That Don't Suck Great for parties, events, cards and trick-or-treating. As firefighters are supposed to be very quick, how do they sleep? What did the directions to the fire department ladder say? now = new Date(); year = now.getYear(); All the firefighters demanded better pay and working conditions. They start a fire under your bath. The firefighter took part in the game show and reached the final.He was comfortable in playing the game because he was in the hot seat! 33. When do firefighters retire? Because the fires they have to fight are wearing orange. Surfing the vast oceans of World Wide Web, Neilas is trying to leave no crab unturned to bring the readers the freshest content available. I dont understand how firefighters can trust a ladder theyre always up to something. What a rip-off. Come on, theyre basically real-life heroes, rescuing kittens, helping damsels in distress, and fighting fires, among all the other things they do! Then, a smoking hot girl walks by. What would happen if Franciscan priests became firefighters? What is the main difference between a firefighter and a worker?Only one out of them is scared of a firing! What did the fireman say to the chairman of the small-town football club, who had asked him to save the cups, when the fire started in the stadium?The firefighter informed him that the fire hadn't spread to the kitchen yet! What starts with f and ends with k? Q: How are people like fires? What should you say when a firefighter is smoking a cigarette? ", "I was telling a joke about a house that burned down to a firefighter the other day. These are good clean fun. "BELL 2 rings and we all slide down the pole. Why dont firefighters have split ends? He felt so relieved to be saved. When an actress saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye. For firefighters, what does the word chaos mean? 2. In the world of magic, what could you also call a water bender? You set my heart on fire. The teacher asked everyone to take their seats and sit quietly, then asked Johnny to step into the hall. Please provide your email address and we will send your password shortly. Q: Whats on every fire department menu? Why do firefighters use lights and sirens on the tops of the firetruck? "Life is a waste of time, and . Make your joke super short. How quickly can a forest fire start?Lightning fast! Their will to succeed. 105 of the best short jokes and one-liners to get you laughing in seconds What comes after a dragon lights his birthday candles? Top 100 funniest one-liners - Firehouse Forums Need Firefighter insults and jokes - Police Forums & Law Enforcement What is the name of the music group that all firefighters love hearing? Thank you for all your submissions. Funny Fire Jokes A police officer says to a couple, "I'm sorry to tell you this, but your son set the school on fire". Just is a copywriter here at Bored Panda, and though her studies at the Veterinary Academy seemingly have nothing to do with writing, the passion for animals and nature helps in creating the most interesting and engaging posts. Here are a couple of one liners that you may be able to use: "I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early.". Thank you for taking the time to share your feedback with us! Which superhero was the fire department always trying to recruit?Aquaman. Q: Why did the rookie bring his bowling ball to the fire station? His mother didn't want to crush his dreams but she knew he would never be accepted. Because unlike police officers, firefighters dont carry guns out on the job. 50+ Creative Pancake Puns That Will Make You FLIP! Why do they put sexy firefighters in calendars? How to fight a fire. Why was the fire chief calling for more water during the fire?Because the fire had taken place at a sponge factory! All the firefighters demanded better pay and working conditions.To quantify their demands, a pole was taken, and all of them fell down from the hole in the floor! Having 9-11 firefighter in my resume would make it much easier to get jobs. Now just tell us how to get there.The farmer says, Oh, dont you have that big red truck any more?, "They say if you cant stand the heat, get out of the kitchen Which is why I lost my job as a firefighter. It was a shitzu. Why was it taking so long for the fire fighters to get to the strawberry farm? Your account is not active. The fireman wanted to tell a few firemen jokes, but all his excitement was extinguished when they were not well received by the fire department! Clean jokes about firemen, firewomen and fire fighting. What were the two sons of the Spanish firemen named?They were named Jos and HoseB! 1. 31. Best Fire Jokes Giphy What did the flame say to his buddies after he fell in love? 3. 23. Q: Who rides a horse to every fire call? Here are some of the best firefighter jokes that'll sure spark a laugh. Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a Dalmation dog. "My dad is a firefighter !" Fire yourself up with these awesome jokes and puns on firefighters! Firefighter Jokes Firefighter Lovemaking Rules A firefighter came home from work one day and told his wife, "You know, we have a wonderful system at the fire station: Bell 1 rings and we all put on our jackets, Bell 2 rings and we all slide down the pole, Bell 3 rings and we're on the fire truck ready to go. Once you've seen one shopping center, you've seen a mall. 7 Jun, 2022. CTRL + SPACE for auto-complete. I find them hot and leave them wet. What did the restaurant owner say when a firefighter, a rabbi, and a policeman walked into his restaurant? He should have his cabinet together by the end of the weekend. Respect for religion must be reestablished. Why do firefighters wear yellow uniforms in most parts of the world? "Well, he was all like : ARGLALRGHALRLALGALHA !". Fire-Fighter Pickup Lines - Use These at the Fire Station! The only food that firemen like to get on a busy day is a hot dog! Hey Pandas, Who Was Your Favorite Black History Month Icon You Learned About This BHM? The end of a fire. A: FireCRACKERS. Fireman Jokes - Joke Buddha "No," said another. From firefighters putting out fires to firefighters rescuing kittens from trees, these jokes will have you laughing out loud. Well, it turns out this esteemed profession is no exception, and here we are with our list dedicated to firefighter jokes! Why did the fireman resign from the department?The job was a bad match. Jared Goldstein The Hilarious Young Comic Making Waves with His Witty Humor, James Heaney Learn about This Multi-Talented Improv Artist, The Funniest Hispanic Comedians You Must Know About. Did you hear about the fireman who was hurt rescuing a cat from a tree?He went out on a limb. First of all, it is so short that by telling it, you'll never miss the 'magical moment' and will always leave your audience amused (that is, if you've calculated your timing perfectly). Bad jokes and one liners - so bad that they are funny Fire Jokes One Liners - Gregbno Blog Why dont most firefighters like to put candles on their birthday cake like everyone else? A. Ooops! 15 Funny Wedding Toasts & Jokes to Steal - The Knot Why was it taking so long for the fire fighters to get to the strawberry farm?There was a traffic jam. Flames. Fire Jokes Someone threw my 70s records on the fire. El bombero y el barco tienen cascos "I dont understand how firefighters can trust a ladder Theyre always up to something. Related Topics. What does CHAOS stand for? The fireman invested a lot of money in the new piece of land downtown. Hey Pandas, What Are Some Of Your Favorite Dad Jokes? Paramedics and EMTs can be staring down a life-or-death situation in the blink of an eye. Girl in the bar: What do you do for a living?The firefighter: I make the six oclock news.. Why was the fireman depressed and sad one day?Because he had met his old flame that day! With great amazement water was pooring from the boys mouth. A nursery school teacher was delivering a station wagon full of kids home one day when a fire truck zoomed past. ", Jose and Josb Why did the fireman resign from the department? What kind of web browser do firefighters use? The firefighter was in the house when the alarm went for an explosion.As he was trying to get out, he took the calendar along with him because he wanted to save the day! 93. Why was the man who worked in a hydrant plant always late at his work?Because one cannot park near the place! What does CHAOS stand for? Q: How did the firefighter find the fire? The fireman looks a little closer and notices the little boy has tied the dog to the wagon by its testicles. What was the thing that firefighters happen to say when the church caught on fire in the small town?They all said, "Holy Smoke!". Mr Graham sir White Hart Lane is on fire The cups man. Eventually they go home together, the next day the mans mom calls. One to change the bulb and 3 to chop a hole in the roof. CATCHY and FUNNY SAFETY SLOGANS FOR THE WORKPLACE - Safety Risk .net "Stop dropping rolls.". They are also known as firefighters, fire-chiefs, relievers, fire wardens, fire-fighters, stokers, cinder monkeys, smoke-jumpers, engineer's helpers, attendants and firemen. Did you hear about the fireman who was hurt rescuing a cat from a tree? Why would firefighters be great action movie stars? How did the firefighter propose to his colleague from the fire department? Whats the most important way to extinguish a fire in your kitchen? Top 100 funniest one-liners 10-05-2009, 10:14 AM 1 I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesnt work that way. 82.43 % / 3814 votes. The first known female firefighter was Molly Williams in 1818. "Mr Graham sir, W. More 2 - A man calls the fire department and says, "Yes, I have just had my front yard landscaped, I ha. How can one tell that there is a firefighter at a party? If we had to choose the least funny profession, firefighters would be our top choice. Woman Takes DNA Test For Fun Only To Discover Her Long-Term Boyfriend Is Her Full Sibling, Woman Flabbergasted At Thrift Store's Prices, Calls Them Out By Sharing 14 Examples, "I Just Said Thank You And Left": Mans Nice Gesture Is Praised After Pizza Hut Driver Got A $20 Tip On A $938 Order, 50 Times People Were So Surprised With How Perfectly Things Lined Up, They Just Had To Document It, Woman Is Upset That Neighbors Shed Is Too Big, Calls Inspector, Regrets It When They Maliciously Comply, European Is Shocked To Learn How American Suburbs Work, Goes Online To Ask Some Accurate Questions, "Never Come Back To My Restaurant": Chef Bans Rude Restaurant Patrons And Gives $1,350 Bill To 22 Y.O. But the good news is it was an orphanage, so I have no parents to notify". If you would like to change your settings or withdraw consent at any time, the link to do so is in our privacy policy accessible from our home page.. Some other famous Americans who were firefighters were George Washington, Alexander Hamilton, John Hancock, Samuel Adams and Paul Revere. Little boy, says the fireman, I dont want to tell you how to run your fire truck, but if you were to tie that rope around the dogs neck I think you could go faster., The little boy says, Youre probably right mister, but then I wouldnt have a siren!. 52 Cow Puns Thatll Tip You Over From Laughter, Things to Do in Colorado Springs with Kids. Then I realized he was just an arsonist.". The firefighter was shocked when he got to know that one of his two sons had set fire to the building. How do you get down from an aerial ladder? Whats inside most home fire extinguishers? Firefighter jokes and firefighter humor. 25 Engineering Jokes That Will Certainly Cheer You Up | IE Before long it exploded into flames and an alarm went out to fire departments from miles around. A: Just in case he had to save the day. Why did the man hug the fire exit and said everything was ok?It had a sign that said it was alarmed. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness. Because theyre a real bright spark when theyre younger. A third child concluded. Cheeky Firefighter Jokes to Experience Good Cheer & Frivolity Cats and ladders Manage Settings What did the directions to the fire department ladder say? Fireman Jokes One Liners - NicholasMims Blog Firework Jokes Got my friend an unnecessarily large rocket this year. The little boy is in a little red wagon with little ladders hung off the side. Their will to succeed. What happened to the firefighter who wasn't doing well in his job?He got fired! Why do firefighters wear yellow overalls with stripes? (charge a hose is the term for filling a hose with water). You will actually need 5 to change a light bulb.One to change it while the others will cut a hole in the roof and hold the ladder! Because they already see more than enough fire at work. Fisherman = Fisherfighter. When can one say that a firefighter is down? Burned to a crisp. "Step 1, Step 2, Step 3". As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases. From the distance a long siren was heard and another fire truck came into sight. They use him to keep crowds back, said one youngster. A: They carry their own hose and can stomp out fires. Firefighter Jokes: The Humor That's Kept Firefighters from Killing Each Other for the Last 350 Years.